Epic Failure… or was it?

For God has not given us a spirit of fear,

but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

~ 2 Timothy 1:7

Today I want to share how my epic failure, this past Sunday, has turned into an inspiring blessing.  OK… those of you that don’t know… I just learned how to swim this year.  I learned at a great salt water pool located at Aqua Fit Plano.  Did you catch the “salt water pool” part?  Anyway… I learned and I was quite proud of myself.  So proud that I decided to sign up for my hubby’s Corporate Challenge 50m freestyle swimming event.  I figured I had well over a month and a half to train for the race. What could go wrong… LOL. Well… unfortunately… life happened and I didn’t get to train like I wanted to, but I thought I could swing it.  Heck, I eat half marathons for lunch.  I can handle 50 meters in a pool.  WRONG… VERY WRONG!!!  So, back to the story.  My hubby sends me a few of the “swim team emails”.  These people were really practicing.  This should have given me a clue to the complexity of the event I was about to partake in. BUT OOOOH NOOOOO… NOT ME!!  Clues are so overrated. 

So the day of the event comes and I get lost trying to get to the natatorium.  YET ANOTHER CLUE FOR THE CLUELESS! I finally get there.  I get the swim meet packet.  I find my name… heat 5 of 6 in the women’s 50m freestyle.  I have the nerve to think to myself… this is pretty darn cool… “my” name in a swim meet packet.  Who would have ever imaged it? This feeling of euphoria does not last long.  I make my way to the swimming pool and I find myself standing in the belchers looking down on what appears to be an Olympic qualification meet for swimming.  Seriously… there are people everywhere.  They were swimming up and down both sides of the pool, stretching on the sidelines, comparing goggles… you name it… they were doing it.  Me, on the other hand... I couldn’t even figure out how to get to the dig dang pool… CLUE, CLUE, CLUE!!!

I make my way through the maze called the women’s locker room and I come out on the “competition” side of the pool.  This is where the story starts to get good.  As I strolled around the pool, in search of my team, I couldn’t help but notice just how pretty the blue pool water was.  Then it slowly dawned on me that the water was getting prettier and bluer as the meters grew in distance.  I forced myself to look at the depth of the pool (knowing the deepest pool I ever swam in was 9 feet).  I noticed 6 feet (ok… that’s not too bad), 12 feet (ok… this joke is not getting any funnier), then 18 feet (WHAT??? 18 FEET… ARE YOU MAD???). If this CLUE  wasn’t enough for me… then the manatee and mermaid I saw swimming gracefully in the 18 feet section of the ocean, I mean pool, should have been. 

 

I make my way to the team and we start discussing the plan for the day.  I am getting nervous... to say the least.  I glance at a few people warming up in the pool.  I see someone actual do that fancy “flip thing” the real swimmers do at the end of the lane to swim back to the other side of the pool.  WTH??? I didn’t learn that move!  Can I do this?  We start warming up on the sideline.  I even got to do that Michael Phelps arm flapping thing while sporting my headphones.  SWEET!  I snap out of my Olympic dream haze and reality sets back in. 

 

I get in the pool and come quickly to the decision… no, no I can’t do this.  I sink like a rock in the pool.  Remember I told you I half-butt trained in a “salt water” pool.  This chlorine business is a completely different animal.  To say the least… my water warm up did not go as well as my land warm up.  To the point… that I got out and told the team captain (Jane), who I just met mind you, that I should totally bail on this event before I entertain everyone with my one man traveling drowning act. Jane was great about it… she was very encouraging and I bought the team a few extra participation points for the challenge.   “You can do it” she said.  “I’ll get in with you and practice some” she said.  She did just that and we had a good practice.  Jane would make an excellent coach.  Especially if I had another month and a half to train with her.  Unfortunately, I was still nervous.  Jane must have sensed my nervousness, because when we got out of the pool and she immediately grabbed my hands and said “let’s pray”.  We prayed and I did feel better about the situation. 

I go over to the starting area and wait for my heat. Jane is right there cheering me on. My hubby and son are in the bleachers supporting me too. Suddenly, I have an out of body experience.  I watch myself get into the water.  I am mesmerized by the sight of my own right hand grabbing the edge of the pool.  I gazed at my left hand as it stretches out straight, fingers pointed at the far wall, like a true Olympian. I feel the cool sensation on my toes as someone’s feet were poised against the side of the starting wall.  I hear someone else’s heartbeat in my ears. Am I really doing this? Am I really doing this?

 

Then I hear the flat starting race tone. I push off… I’m going, I’m going, I’m going.  Then I look down at the bottom of the pool and see the long black pool marking.  It’s so far away.  Hey… there’s that manatee and mermaid again.  Hey… they are pointing at me in amazement.  Hey… I am not breathing right.  I realize quickly that I am NOT going to finish this race. I stopped… yep… I stopped. The chick that can run flat out for 2+ hours straight and not even flinch about it… and no zombies have to chase me to do it.  I put up my hand to signify the disqualification and start to swim back to safety. I climbed out of the pool… completely mortified inside, but I hold my head up high and smile from ear to ear.  I admit… I let my nerves get the best of me.  However, I did something that I never thought I would do… I GOT IN THE POOL AND I TRIED.

Jane gave me a big hug.  My hubby gave me an endearing smile and told me “you’ll get’em next year babe”.  My son even gave me a high 5!  I didn’t meet this goal, but I will next time.  As I told my Facebook friends and family… I WILL be back and I WILL show that pool (and my nerves) who’s DA BOSS!  My FB crew were very encouraging too. 

 

These are some of the posts I received after my defeat:

~ Atta girl!! The English Channel for your 40th birthday!! You can do it!!!

~ You conquered running....it's only a matter of time before you lick this. I'm so proud of you for getting in that pool....you go girl!!

~ Way to go girl - I am VERY proud of you!! Very courageous to jump in and go for it. Keep on keepin' on.

~ Great job!!! I am very proud of you and you are inspiring me!!! And I have no doubt you will dominate that pool next time!

~ The biggest hurdle is getting out of your fears, you are doing just that! Congratulations!!!

~ Gotta start somewhere and that u did.

~ Way stay positive and at least u tried! You'll get it next time

~ Be encouraged… you did it!!! And that is the best thing!

~ I'm very proud that you went out there, got wet and did your best. It's going down next year!

~ Way to stay motivated!!! He that began that good work in you he will finish it. Amen!

~ Yea! Remember to cup the hands as you bring them back into the water. Helps with momentum. I may not be able to run, but swim I can!! Goooooo LR!!!!

 

How can I not be in encouraged when I read stuff like that!!  Jane, the team captain, even said her husband was inspired by my efforts.  God places us in situations that allow us to grow and learn to lean on him.  I allowed the sprit of fear to take over my situation.  This Epic Failure has given me a chance to be humble and remember the small things.  Like the importance of proper training.  God wants his children to be prepared in everyway and in every facet of life.  If this means “training with the team” next year… you better believe I am going to do it.   God has given me the victory.  I am going to use this event to propel myself forward and soar.  As one of my friends (LS) said… “Go after your goals and live on purpose”. I will train properly for my next water race an I WILL EAT THAT RACE FOR LUNCH!!  You can bet the farm on that one.  In my best Terminator voice… I’ll be back!

 

Until next time… happy swimming to all of the swimmers out there. J

LR… OMM40:31